I’m feeling particularly horrible today (physically). I hope I’m not getting sick. On the train to this job everything was fine. However, soon after I arrived here, I was hit with a wave of dizziness. I’m also currently experiencing the awfulness that is AF. I wonder if the two are related since I was bleeding a lot yesterday. I thought it may be a blood sugar issue, but I ate breakfast and some fruit after breakfast. Blood sugar should be fine. Every time I bend my head down or look down I feel like I’m going to fall over. It’s a perfectly shitty feeling. I want to go home, but I can’t as I committed to this job today. Japan doesn’t look highly on those who bugger off from work especially those who do so because of sickness. Here if you’re sick, you work through it. People generally don’t take sick days here. If this persists, I may just pop out to the vending machine and get a Coke.
Sigh. Two days of work and I’m ready to throw in the towel. What’s wrong with me? The good news is while working I’m too busy to be depressed. I’m too busy to hate my life and feel sorry for myself. Tomorrow I’m busy all day too and Friday I’m busy part of the day. I’m tired. I’m having trouble falling asleep at night. Today I had plans to meet a friend after work but I just cancelled since I feel horrible. I felt bad initially, but then I thought, “I don’t know this girl very well. My health is more important right now than worrying if I hurt some girl’s feelings. If she has a problem with that, she’s an asshole.” In the end, she was fine with my changing the day.
Perhaps I spread myself too thin this week. That’s likely the case. Especially since I didn’t do much getting out of bed the past few weeks. I’m going to power through this day and then go straight to bed when I get home. I just have to make it to 2:15. That’s 4 more hours. I can do this.