Naru says that karma works this way. You pay for the mistakes of your past life in your current life. I said I must have been a real dick in my past life. Maybe I was a murderer of just a really shitty person. I’m having a helluva time navigating this life successfully.
I’m drunk. Or I could have just started drinking. You don’t know. Maybe I’m an unreliable narrator. Well, I’m not. Most of the time I give you the whole story. Or do I? My POV is based on my interpretation of events, so by that characteristic shouldn’t all first person narrators be considered unreliable? The truth is I just started drinking. I’m certain I’ll be drunk eventually. No telling what blogs will come of that. I hope to be so perfectly sloshed that writing won’t even cross my mind. The last two Thursdays have been back to back freelance work eating up most of my day. Today I met with a new client. She’s young and pretty, and I’m envious.
This morning I woke up to a job offer in my email box. Holy shit it’s my first one! And I just interviewed for it yesterday. Actually, I like the appeal of this job. (I’ll call it Company H, since it hasn’t appeared elsewhere in the blog yet.) It’s 3 days a week (which means I can keep most of my freelance work). I’d probably ditch the on-call work. The hours are unbeatable 12PM – 5PM. I spoke with one of my freelance jobs today and explained to her the situation. She’s going to let me know how best we can work around this job since I commit two hours at a time to her once a week (and the job at Company H falls right in the middle of that). She seemed okay with shifting the day or time around though. Tomorrow I’m meeting with Demande, so I’ll talk to him about the new schedule (which I don’t think will be a problem since we meet on Monday and Friday and those are days off from Company H). I’m not going to lie. I am very interested in this job, but I’ve really enjoyed just freelancing. However, I don’t want giant gaps in my resume. I am having anxiety already. I consider myself horrible at making decisions, so every time I make one I think that it’s probably the wrong decision (thanks anxiety you fucking beast). The good news is this job at Company H has everything going for it, and it’s really low stress.
This is where I’m at and why I’m drinking right now. I wish I could talk to Naru about this. I wish I could talk to Motoki about this. He has a lot of knowledge about my field in Japan. I already ran it by Artemis. He seems to think it’s a good bet. I’d be happy to know what the WordPress community thinks. I’m off to sketch and drink some more.