I’ve been nursing a wee hangover all day.  Last night I went out drinking to two 外人 bars.  One had butterscotch schnapps and the other, margaritas.  How could I resist either of those things?  I’ve drank my weight in water today, but still this headache hasn’t subsided.  I had fun, so it was worth it.

So today we did domestic chores: dishes, vacuuming, making fat bombs, etc.  Then Mamoru went off to work.  After work he went to a beer bar with tons of beers on tap.  He just messaged me now saying he’s coming home, but I want to go to bed soon.  I have yoga in the morning.

I really wish I would have gone somewhere tonight too.  I had several opportunities to do things.  Kotono invited me out, Michiru invited me out, another friend invited me out, and there was a Meetup event I wanted to go to.  I didn’t do any of those things.  Instead, I took a nap and then watched some TV and as the night wore on I felt lonelier and lonelier as no one messaged me because they were all too busy having fun.  Mostly I thought about Demande.  I talked to Kunzite earlier this week about Demande’s second disappearance.  He said that if I’m to be Demande’s friend, I need to accept that shutting himself up and away from everyone is how he deals.  It doesn’t make it hurt any less.  Kunzite suggested I send him random messages as opposed to messages pleading for him to speak to me.  I tried it, but it’s not yet yielded a response from him.  I am sick and sad about it.  I really thought things were getting better for him.  I can’t bear to think of him in pain.  But I can’t do anything about it.  I could call him, but I haven’t yet.  Maybe on Monday.  I mean I could give up this friendship, but I think that would be even more unbearable.

So that’s the short version of things right now.  Headache from hell and a teetering friendship.