Just a quick note because I have to go to sleep. I’m tired as fuck and I have to get up early tomorrow. Tonight I’ve felt a deep loneliness. I don’t know why. Mamoru is here (though he’s not paying much attention to me). All night I’ve felt sick with loneliness. I just want someone to grab me, squeeze me, hug me, kiss me. I don’t want to ask for it. I want it to just be done because that someone wants to do it. I don’t want to force those feelings out of someone. It’s not happening and it’s too much to ask which hurts. I want to be pushed up against the wall. I want passion to bleed into the air that you could almost touch it. I want too much, but there is so little. There is only loneliness.