Life · Mental Health · Miscarriage · Pregnancy · Weight Loss

Waiting…

As of yesterday, my schedule is completely clear for next week, so I can use that time to recover.  I told one freelance client that I was having surgery.  She inquired what for and where, so I lied to her on both accounts.  Japanese people can be so nosy sometimes.  I hated lying to her, but it’s less painful for me rather than explaining a MC situation to her.  Thankfully, my other two clients didn’t ask specifics and just allowed me to take the time off.  No explanation needed.  I hope it’s because I remain pretty faithful and almost never take days off.  Everything is ready.  Just have to wait until Monday.

In other news I’ve gained 3kg and I can’t blame this weight gain on pregnancy.  It’s due to eating like shit.  It’s especially noticeable in my stomach.  I’m trying to get back on the low carb diet but depression is making that so difficult.  I now weigh 63kg/138lbs.  When I got pregnant I was 61kg/134lbs and my goal weight was 60kg/132lbs.  It may not seem like a tremendous weight gain but it matters to me especially since I worked so hard to get all that weight off.  When I gave up the diet due to pregnancy I had lost 21kg/46lbs.  I was so proud of that accomplishment even though I fell just short of my goal.  I have managed to get back to eating a low carb breakfast.  It’s “lunch” and “dinner” where I fall apart.  I’m using quotes because I ate pickles and cheese for lunch yesterday and guacamole with Doritos for dinner.  What a mess I am.  Who knew that this would happen?  Any of it.  I suppose the PTB did, those fuckers.

I guess that’s it.  On Wednesday one of my clients switched her freelance meeting from Friday to yesterday, so I have today free and clear to lie around and watch “Narcos” and whatever else I need to binge.  I’m looking forward to a day of nothing.  Tomorrow is Community Day in Pokémon Go, so Mamoru and I are planning on wandering around the big touristy area (with tons of Pokéstops) hoping to catch a bunch of Dratini (maybe even a shiny?) and after that we’ll eat 串カツ (one of my favorite things).  Honestly, I don’t feel like going out these days, but if Mamoru is with me I know that it will be okay if something happens.  I know he’ll take care of me, and that makes me feel better about leaving the house.  After Monday though all can return to normal.  Although I’m a little nervous, I’m looking forward to it.  Have a nice weekend everyone.

 

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