Japan · Life · Mental Health

Dumb…

I just got back from my Japanese lesson, and I really like this teacher a lot.  She’s world’s better than my old teacher.  She actually propels the lesson forward like a teacher is supposed to do.  There’s never any dead air.  That’s the good of today.  Now, I’m just counting down the hours until my freelance meeting watching “The Expanse” which is a great show, and I recommend it if you like science fiction.

Mamoru is responsible for the bad by acting dumb again.  This morning he didn’t want to say “I love you” before leaving the house which is super dumb.  I always think like what if this is the last time I’ll ever see him, so I always say “I love you” to people for that very reason.  Last night he decided to sleep on Small Lady’s poo stained beanbag (which is not normally this way but I haven’t washed it yet this week).  Not only is that gross, but it’s a dumb place to sleep when the sofa is less than 2 feet away and the bedroom is just down the hall.  As I’m sure you know I’ve spoken to him countless times about sleeping on the sofa, and he chooses to ignore me and continues to sleep there.  Last night I was annoyed to find him on the poopy beanbag and I kicked him (gently come on I’m not a monster) to wake him up.  Apparently my American style behavior was “shocking” and “disrespectful” (his words).  If he was gonna throw disrespect in my face, I decided to throw it right back in his face stating that it’s disrespectful to ignore my two million requests not to sleep on the sofa.  He had nothing to say to that.  He also said “it cooled at once feelings” and I’m not sure what that means exactly but not loving someone for how they wake you up is one of the dumbest fucking things I’ve ever heard (if not THE dumbest).  I didn’t bother to ask him to clarify that because it was all lumped into a big message which upon receiving it caused me to roll my eyes so far back into my head I’m sure they almost rolled a full 360°.  Two completely different cultures in one marriage is so exhausting sometimes you guys.  I’m pretty quintessentially American.  I’m loud.  I fucking swear.  I don’t give a good fuck what people think of me.  I’m a feminist.  That’s a stark contrast to the dare not bother anyone and always do things in a roundabout so as not to upset or offend anyone Japanese style.  I’m positive that I don’t fit into the Japanese lifestyle.  It’s often a point of contention for Mamoru and me.  Of course, I love Mamoru, but I doubt I’d recommend anyone marry into a culture so vastly different from their own.  As much as I try to believe Mamoru is slightly more global than the majority of the population, he pulls some dumb bullshit like this which lumps him right back into the pool with all the other super Japanese people.  What annoyed me the most was that Mamoru didn’t talk to me about it.  He decided to pout and not say “I love you” both of which are super Mamoru things to do when he’s mad.  Sigh.  Marriage.  Am I right?

In other news radio silence from Eiru still persists.  However, he posted something on his Facebook about wanting to be cut some slack, and I can only guess that was aimed toward his crazy jealous girlfriend.  Sigh.

Nothing really great about today so far.  Just a little good and a whole fuckton of bad.  I’m super excited for Golden Week (but not really as it’s a clusterfuck of a holiday and I really hope Mamoru’s shitty mood doesn’t spoil what little joy I can squeeze from this dumb week).  At least I don’t have to go to Company H.  Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to eat some period approved junk food and watch some more TV.  I hope you’re having better days.

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