Life · Mental Health · Weight Loss

Goodbye April (I’ve had enough of you)…

I know I’ve been MIA.  I’m sorry about that.  It’s been a rough April to say the least.  After recovering from surgery (for the most part), I caught an awful cold.  It fucking crippled me.  I lost my voice for two days, and after that I could not stop coughing (which kept me up all night every night).  Finally two weeks into this shit and feeling like death with the DayQuil and NyQuil not even touching this thing, I decided to go to the doctor.  She said I had a cold and allergies which were exacerbating the cold.  She gave me medicine, and I started to feel better.  However, on Monday I did a favor for Company H (filling in for my old bitch of a supervisor who was out sick), and that night I relapsed.  I coughed all night and couldn’t sleep for shit.  Luckily Tuesday I just had a brief freelance meeting and no work so I could rest, and I did.

A brief intermission to talk about Company K.  I started at Company K, and I like it for the most part.  However, the commute is hell.  It’s 3 trains and a bus, and if I miss one, I’m fucked.  This is actually what happened my first day of work, and I was stuck in the middle of nowhere with no trains and no buses, and I couldn’t catch a cab to save my life.  When I finally did catch a taxi, I had a mental breakdown due to being sick and late to my first day at a new job as well as all the shit that put me in this situation, and I cried off all my makeup.  I was able to compose myself, but my mistake cost me ¥5000 for the taxi which still put me at work 30 minutes late.  So the first day was a shitshow.

Back to this week, Wednesday was a long day at Company K (including the 3 hour commute), so I canceled my freelance that night as well as Thursday night.  Fortunately, I didn’t have to work at Company K on Thursday and Friday.  (My schedule is Wednesday – Friday.)  I’ve been on the sofa watching Netflix to try and recover.  I’ve been able to sleep the past two nights without coughing all night.  I still have coughing fits but they are becoming fewer which I hope means I’m finally on the mend.  I gave up riding my bike for the time being as it had only been making things worse.  It is killing me, but I have to do it.  It’s also affecting my weight which has increased 2kg since I started working at Company K.

To make matters even worse, Small Lady bit me this week.  She has food and territorial aggression which I think are sometimes made worse by KC’s arrival.  Around bedtime she gets a little annoyed.  I put KC on the sofa with Mamoru, and Small Lady started going crazy snarling and growling.  She’s never acted this badly before.  I dropped the package of pumpkin seeds I was holding on the ground to try and distract her, but it didn’t work and while trying to coax her into bed, she lunged at me and bit my inner thigh.  I yelled at her and she seemed to feel ashamed, and after that she remembered herself and went straight to bed.  She went to bed the next night with little argument.  The worst part was that while I was crying in the bathroom Mamoru did nothing to check on me or comfort me.  He didn’t even look up from his iPad which erupted into a fight.  I’m now nursing a large bruise on my leg.

So I had a huge gallstone, had surgery, I caught a nasty cold made worse by allergies, my dog bit me, and for the icing on the cake, I got my period.  PTB, are you done yet?!?!  Jesus fucking Christ.  It’s enough please.  It’s more than enough.  My mental health is suffering tremendously.  I need to leave this house.  I need to get back to my normal life.  Fuck all of this shit.  I’m not feeling great.  Everything stacked on top of everything else tends to be too much after a while.  I need to be better.  I lost all of March due to the gallstone, and I’ve lost most of April due to this cold and allergies.  I’d really like to enjoy 2019 at least a little bit.  Can I?

I hope you’re doing better than I am.  I promise to be more vigilant on future updates.  Be well.


One thought on “Goodbye April (I’ve had enough of you)…

  1. Hi Pink,
    I followed your journey on Kindara over two years ago and for some reason thought I’d click on your profile again and saw the link to your blog… I read it a couple of times before. I’m so pleased I dod I’ve just lost half an hour of my life reading what you’ve been up to and I’m sorry about all the crap that’s happening! April is long gone and I’m hoping May has been a little kinder to you?


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